Swallow Crystals and Laugh Prisms.

Saturday, November 8, 2008

my art has been a direct reflection of my life

Cheap Wine Time

and "Knightmare and Mane"

This woman kicks so much ass. Who WOULDN'T want to be her??
I introduce you to: Jennifer Herrema

I've "discovered" RTX through my friend Amanda. Who is a new friend as of our "interview" two weeks ago. I feel like I should post my topic proposal for Degree Project so you guys know how all this fits together. Amanda is about RTX like I am about Spindrift or Orange Sunshine. We just get injected with this unreal excitement and convey so much insane enthusiasm about them that the person we're talking to rides on our energy straight to giving the group a listen.
Okay, here is my topic proposal. Hope it's not boring.

The Groupie and the Rock & Roll Lifestyle
I’m teetering on the verge of completely immersing myself in the shallow, delightfully wicked pool of the rock and roll lifestyle known as the reality of tour. I open my arms to its delicious trappings. It’s been several years since I’ve dared to dream of this unconventional lifestyle, but from sheer passion and self-belief I finally managed to crawl to the edge of this fucked oasis and lap at its outer ripples.
Rock and roll is a poisonous, addictive culture, fettered with romanticism and glamorization. Rock and rollers are outlaws not by choice but by the necessities of their passion. Unlike any other existence, musicians are encouraged to wallow in negative feelings. The only true romantic bit of the rock and roll lifestyle is being in a bed of creativity, where it is conceived, and being a part of that conception. And that bit overrides almost all the darkness, the unnatural stress on the physical that tour demands, the emotional rollercoaster, running dry and yearning.
At 17 I found that there was a name for the way I felt about music. I wanted to be a groupie because music had saved me and had grown into such a beautiful beast within me that it gnawed at every inch of my expression and that from then on, I knew I could only make it with people who felt he same as I did. Shows became a platform during which I could crawl out of my stomach and become this pure thing; it was like I could finally breathe.
It took years to get to where I am now, at 21, and I’m still sort of floating in the middle, trying to live two realities, trying to balance priorities with this innate need for the live music experience. For those of us that wouldn’t be alive today if it weren’t for music, we are intrinsically tied with it. There is a community whose members all possess that same edge. The communal nature of music is unique, as it affects multiple senses and willingly or unwillingly involves anyone in the area. It is malleable, alive, and interactive. It is a passion that everyone loves but few live. It takes an enormous amount of drive to live music, you have to let every atom of your being become absolutely possessed by it, it has to consume your life completely, you have to willfully give yourself over. There is no pretending that you might have the freedom to do anything but. This is why I can never completely be myself, never be happy or comfortable with someone who doesn’t share this passion. Music is in my blood, it is my savior and my lover, it is everything. People who don’t feel this way will never fully understand that. I have no choice, I didn’t choose this path, I accepted it.
I find that I have an incredible amount of love to give, and I want to give it to the people who create what moves me. As much as I want to be their muse, I need them to be mine. The relationship between a musician and a true groupie is a symbiotic one.

I want to visually explore my experiences as a groupie, and I plan to do this in a myriad of formats, culminating in an installation that will utilize the sense of hearing. I am especially interested in creating transgressive art and manipulating the viewer into having an interactive experience with my work. I will explore the different aspects of being a groupie and will discuss these aspects with other groupies. Topics of discussion may include, but are not limited to, how being possessed by this manic love affects our lives, how we see the world, how we create our own world, the addictive nature of rock and roll, inspiring and being inspired, the aesthetic, the image, the love and the loneliness. I’d like to give people a look inside one of my existences.
I’m a collector of images, and I want to continue to collect images that speak to my topic and fit them together. I will stay away from literal interpretation and will create and use a dictionary of personal symbols to represents concepts and people. I will read memoirs and watch documentaries and make lists of the aesthetics and potential symbols, and look at how they relate to my own.
I’m not interested in using traditional formats to present my art, and this project will also be an exploration of alternative presentation formats for my illustrations. I plan to work chronologically through my history with the rock and roll subculture.
I want my art, like humour, to shock me in a dry, honest way. I like art that involves the fourth dimension of time and decays and disintegrates and that is functional. I need to keep my art organic and imperfect. I need it to be in a constant state of flux because I cannot allow my creations to be stagnant.

Amanda fits into this because she was in Pamela des Barres' latest book "Let's Spend the Night Together," she's not really a GROUPIE, she just happens to have relationships with musicians, and she's the coolest rock and roll girlfriend EVER.  She's also a professional photographer so it was incredibly enlightening to talk with her about how she goes about balancing and interweaving her passions.  I aspire to be like her one day.  Soon.  It'll be soon.


Anonymous said...

You are one of the most interesting, brave people I've ever met. I can't wait to see your progress on this. It's pretty intense stuff.

Tuesday Morning said...

lindsay, why are you so fucking goddamn sweet?
i don't know what's brave about anything i do. i just do what i want or do what i have to do to get what i want, and anyone can do that.

Anonymous said...

And to me, that's amazing :) I wish I could do the same.

You're amazing!